swingsister (swingsister) wrote,

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LING: This shit is bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

BARNEY: Hey! You stole my voice ANd my line!

*Barney sues Ling*

GWEN STEFANI: Actually Barney, that's MY line - from MY song!

*Gwen sues Barney*

BARNEY: Oh, yeah? Well you stole that one song from "Fiddler on the Roof"!

*Tevye sues Gwen Stefani*

TEVYE:*singing with that weird Tevye shimmy* Now I am a rich man, idle didle didle diddle diddle diddle deedle dum, since I sued that Gwen Stefani bitch, idle deedle didle didle dum.

Yeah, there's a bit of randomness that only Tiff and I can understand.

As for my day today, I did practically nothing. Oh, I checked out eharmony.com, only to find that it sucks. Well, maybe it's great for some, but not me. I'm just sick of meeting people at school, or at clubs, or whatever, just to have it all crumble apart in my hands. I don't know what the problem is. I'm smart, attractive, and fun. (Nothing wrong with saying that if you don't take yourself seriously) But I just can't find a guy that I can last with. They always either become obsessed or our spark just totally fades away. I want a LONG TERM relationship! Not the short lived ones always have. I always thought going to a website for that kind of thing was beyond lame. But, I dunno, I guess it was my lame ass lonely Valentines Day spent doing Homework while babysitting that pushed me to do it. It set me up with four guys. A personal trainer, who was alright, but really shared none of my interests, a dork who said he was 24 and had never had a girlfriend, an anime geek (not a normal anime fan. an anime geek) which would not be for me at all, and some other guy who I'm not so sure about. I guess I'll just have to continue meeting people the old fashion way. Hopefully one day I'll meet a guy who is neither indifferent, nor obsessive. A nice normal guy.

I know that no ones "ideal" mate really exists. Ther's always differences and flwas. But just for fun, since everyone has an image of perfection in their mind about a mate, here's mine:

He has dark, thick hair.

He has beautiful eyes. Preferably brown, but I don't really care what color.

His skin is clear, creamy and smooth, and he is at least more tan than I am.

He does NOT have that typical hot guy look that all the girls are going for right now. He's got something interesting about his face - not perfect. Like a scar, or a pronounced nose or something. In his face is character. NOT perfection!

He's not too much taller than me.

He's NOT beefy. He's not digustingly scrawney. He's thin slim and trim, but I still feel secure in his arms. He's healthy and in decent shape.

He pampers me, but isn't overly mushy

He makes me feel secure and protected.

He doesn't let anybody treat me badly.

There is no questioning that I am his, but he doesn't own me, because he is mine as much as I'm his.

He gets jealous of other guys in a flattering and sexy way, but not in an obsessive way.

He takes care of me, and I support him.

He is sucessful: doctor, lawyer, businessman, ect. But he has an appreciation for my child like side and likes to have fun with me.

He is kind, sweet and patient with me; but doesn't mind the occasional healthy bickering... we always make up. ;)

Oh, Yeah. He's clean shaven. Facial hair is gross! Except on Sawyer... yummy....

Yeah well, I know I'll never find that guy exactly. But I can always keep looking for something remotely close.

Well, I guess I'll go to bed now. I have to go to alli Schwartz birthday party tomorrow, (she's 4 now) and I have the cutest little Barbie mermaid dress up thing or whatever it is for her. I really hope she likes it.

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And then Tiff and Kim get sued for making fun of everyone...hahaha

Man Kim, picky much? just kidding I'm just as bad...Some of the traits you're looking for in a man are ones I'm looking for too. It's just so hard to find the perfect man I always get the guys falling for me who I am not attracted to in that way and think of as friends. then they get mad at me for not returning the feelings. That or I fall for someone already taken or dosen't want commitment. it blows...
Yeah, I forgot thee part where we get sued. lol.

It sucks! It's always the guys you want that you can't have, and the guys you're not interested in that want you. It's like they say in Seinfeld: "When you like them, they don't like you, when they like you, you don't like them." I hate when guy friends get mad at you for not returning romantic feelings. I really don't think men are capable of being friends with a girl - genuine friends. They're too stupid.
How could you forget about us? lol

Guys just don't get the let's be friends thing. They're like dumb dogs.
you said it
Ha. You should have met me in my younger years, sweetheart. (after the awkward dorky period of course.) Don't worry, the right guy will come along some day. just make sure that he's not a schmuck, and that he treats you like the Queen of Sheba. And make sure he makes plenty of dough; so you can sit back and play in it; the way class-A dames like you and Tiff are supposed to.
Hehehe. Why, Thank you. I hope so. And yes, he'd better treat me like the Queen of Sheba. And a successful man would be nice. If only we'd been from the same decade Al. Of course you'd probably rather have Tiff. Hahaha.